train ride for life.

2008-08-10T19:57:00.002+08:00

goodbye alicia ong! study hard!!!

sheesh, i don't know how many more goodbyes i've got to say in the next few months! goodbyes are never easy to say.

oh well, i guess goodbyes are an inevitable part of ns as well. now, as i'm posted out, more goodbyes will have to be said. to the friends i made in the course, to my section mates, to my hq pals, to ati, goodbye.

hello 4sab.

2008-07-26T01:09:00.001+08:00

ok, i love to blame and complain.

when it comes to solutions? i've got none.

so what's the use?

2008-07-26T00:14:00.003+08:00

what for force people together if there are clashes in ideas, interests and values? there would be no true emotion coming out from within us, defeating a main purpose of performing. it'll look dead, far from being ebullient. what we've done so far is just slovenly work, and nothing is going to blossom. anyway, i don't think i want some irascible person who would cause infirmities in our family. don't colour your words and make it sound morally excellent, when what you gave was a tight slap on our faces.

i shall commiserate over our lousy choice.

we shall make a better one next time.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
marianne; thanks for organising that! i'm glad it was no where near being rambunctious. unlike its fairly old enemy - clubbing. i'd love to go again, although there are some objections at home. haha.

2008-06-22T17:06:00.002+08:00

oops. how time passes. i've now passed out from sispec and am currently in ati - armour traning institute.

back in bmt, i dreaded infantry, and wanted to get out desperately. the endless road marches and soc gave me no reason to stay. i just didn't want infantry as my vocation, and thought that any other vocation would do just nicely. i even thought that armour was the best. after all, how hard could driving a tank be? anyway, since many people told me about the perks of being a mp - military police, i wanted to go there. unfortunately, i had no say in my fate and got posted to sispec - school of infantry specialists (notice the bold word), instead of my indication to become a mp (hey, i excelled in my interview ok?). oh, how i cursed and cursed. but, i thought to myself, "hey, i got a chance to enter a leadership school, that must mean something about me!". moreover, there was another chance to become a mp again, and as a spec! oooo, how i hoped and hoped that that would've been fulfilled. and i heard that armour and engineers really sucked, so i needed to go to mp. but no, i got disappointed again! armour, my recruit "dream" was realised. how ironic.

life in armour infantry (yes, infantry) has been rather smooth sailing, maybe because i've been excused from pt due to my injury "sustained in sispec". what i hate is the gruelling pt. give me lessons and stuff and i'll gladly accomplish it. so that's what i've been doing and i'm enjoying it. however, i won't pass out as a 3sg cause i won't be able to taking the ippt and soc. i'll see where this goes... might be taken out of the course.

once armour, always armour
hahaha oh how corny i find that. oops.

with regard to my uni choice, i got nus science and accepted it. i hope i get fst. i doubt my appeal to pharmacy would work, since i've not heard from them thus far. whereas others got called up already.

tag replies;
luan; don't worry. if i'm out of course, i'll be free, free! hahaha.
soph; same same, free free i will be!

oh yes, i miss my social life a lot so those who were my friends, you still are, and i'd better still be yours! hahaha. i want to meet up, but i'm lazy. so please, please sms me or something! darn, i just missed yesterday's mco meeting due to saturday book out. sheesh.

wilco, out.

2008-05-03T13:08:00.002+08:00

updates on unis.

i've already been accepted into ntu's biological sciences course. they even offered me a direct entry into the accelerated bachelor's programme, in view of my "excellent" academic achievement. hahaha. they sound quite desperate offering it to me considering what i got for gp. but i heard that ntu only looks at your h2s, so yeah.

smu economics hasn't given me a reply although my interview was weeks ago.

i just came back from the nus pharmacy discretionary admission interview, in which im vying with 100+ others for a spot in the 14 places left. discretionary admission again... hahaha. i think i screwed up some parts, but i really hope i can get it! i didn't even get to sniff medicine..

come end-may, i hope i see some good news in the letter-box!

2008-05-01T23:00:00.002+08:00

only after reading blogs and looking at photos, then i realised how many things i missed. is it my fault for planting my butt at home on free days? i was free last night, but... whatever.

2008-04-27T21:31:00.001+08:00

i hate section live firing.

2008-04-20T19:12:00.002+08:00

6 more days to my birthday. but 6 days of intense torture before i can book out next sunday, missing my birthday altogether ):

filed camps, strength/speed/endurance/combat (don't the names give you shudders?) training, navigation in mandai and section live firing are all going to happen in the remaining days. how sucky. i just came back from a 3d 2n field camp and i got kisses from lots of mozzies on my hands. extremely itchy!

anyway, i've been failing my ippt due to my standing broad jump and i can't pass my course if i don't pass (even a pass in ippt is not good enough!). please pray for my fitness! (:

oh yes, i'd better remember to update my links. so many more to add!

bye! countdown to next field camp: 12 more hours.

2008-04-13T17:55:00.003+08:00

i wish i can get lost in mandai forest or get stuck in a bog so i never have to return. bashing through forests and swamps are not exactly my cup of tea. and i have to do it again tomorrow! and if my group really does get lost, we can forget about sleeping. ippt coming again. passed in bmt; failed in sispec. quite a laughing matter. anyhow, 1st field camp coming soon. gonna book out on saturday night i think. but what i dread is the rain. these few days haven't been exactly a good indicator of fine weather. try sleeping in rain! (luckily i haven't done it before cause my bmt field camp never rained!) but i don't wanna try it. oh well. and because of today's early book in, i've to miss njchoir's cantab choir concert, my last chance to see the juniors that i know perform! and i haven't seen ms lim in eons. how my heart is filled with regret.

nvm, my birthday's coming soon.

soph; sorry for not being able to make it for the concert today! hope you had fun! haha, you got my sms about dinner right? will be looking forward to that! (:

2008-03-30T15:08:00.003+08:00

... sispec warriors, we are the warriors, sispec warriors, with pride we will lead! ...

that monotonous song is sung at least 10 times everyday. i'd rather sing the infantry song. at least that's in a major key and is uplifting. the sispec song is plain demoralising. BUT, i only have to suffer there for only EIGHT weeks thanks to the saf for shortening it from ten. woohoo! shorter than bmt. BUT, there will be night training almost everyday and our schedule is so packed.

AND, due to some section life firing, i'll NOT book out on my BIRTHDAY, 26/04/2008! how sad is that? its a saturday. yet, i'll still be confined till sunday morning. irritating. i don't wanna be at the hands of my bunk mates. maybe i'll get shot during my live firing as a birthday "gift".

anyway, the 1st week has been so-so. really wanted to be out of course and downgrade my pes status because i didn't want to suffer anymore during all the trainings. and there's the stupid obstacle course that i really hate. but thankfully i made some friends and probably that shall keep me going (with all my incessant complaining, that is). back to topic. 2km run every freaking morning for the past week, 3 times of pull-ups before each meal and physical training almost every single day. i dread those the most, and my worst nightmare came to life. but other than those, i've had 3 hours of free time every day right after dinner. i hope that continues. (i can dream on i suppose), and i will dream.

i'm just waiting for the 8 7 weeks to pass and i'll have some rank. heh heh. nonetheless, it's just a corporal. i'm undergoing the basic section leader's course (bslc) now and i really hope i don't get chosen after the 8 weeks to proceed to the advanced slc because it's really worse. more pt and field camps. military police please please please!

adios.

2008-03-20T00:14:00.005+08:00

pictures from vietnam!

one major difference in traffic:
when singaporean's honk, it means: you barged into my path! or whatever traffic offences made.
when vietnamese honk, it means: get out of my way!

there is incessant honking all day long, right into the dead of the night. the ratio of cars to motorcycles - 1:50 - i'm not kidding. that's why the large vehicles have to honk to get the 'midgets' out of their way. hahaha. but other than the traffic, everything else was good. souvenirs and food were very cheap, but there would still be the bargaining. haha. the visit to the war remnants museum was also and eye-opener. especially the horrific pictures of exploded bodies and dismembered heads in black and white. another disturbing factor was the effects of the chemical warfare the us used on the vietnamese. a chemical called agent orange affects pregnant women, causing them to produce babies with physical defects. rather sad. these effects still last presently because the chemicals still linger around in the soil that may be used for agricultural purposes. when the toxic product is eaten, the effects follow. used tanks and planes are displayed as seen in the photos!

ok, now about my passing out parade! i've officially graduated from bmt, with much suffering and pain i must say. i would've enjoyed it more if it didn't rain. but since it rained during every rehearsal, i was well prepared! haha. more photos at:

http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=30366&l=856f6&id=628310988

i will miss all my friends there! how i wish the 2 years would be spent with them :(

there's an mco outing tomorrow. hope everyone will go! can't wait to go out again. haha.

tag replies:
cheej; my oc said that even if there was a cat 1, we'll still carry on per usual. but that didn't happen for me, so :p hahaha
yh; hahaha, that's with a cap :x
yuntian; i only saw you once, live! haha, during results day right. nah, you didn't see properly haha.
roman; thank you!
sophia; enjoyed it. real great! (;

2008-03-15T00:10:00.001+08:00

i'll be going to vietnam for a short holiday from tomorrow to tuesday. i can still be contacted on my hp though, provided m1 has the "pay as you roam" serivce there. byebye!

2008-03-08T13:08:00.003+08:00

is my english that bad - bad enough to warrant me that grade?

2008-02-23T15:19:00.005+08:00

acceptance, tolerance and confidence.

those helped me through my field camp! somehow, i rarely felt homesick (although the day before it i couldn't bear to part with my phone). and i adapted to the living conditions quite fast - shitting on soil, peeing anywhere green, sleeping in holes. i think i had 75% fun and 25% complaining. and trust me, singapore's weather can fall right down to 19 degrees celcius. the weather in tekong is damn cooling in the morning. the first night when i didn't wear my socks to sleep, i nearly froze to death when i woke up the next day. sleeping wasn't uninterrupted either. cold weather would wake you up, and there's always the sgts pulling your rifle out from your grip at night - how irritating.

also, thank God that not a single drop of rain fell from the sky during my whole 6 days. imagine sleeping in mud! brr.... bound to catch a cold. only when we came back to camp then it rained for about 10mins haha. other companies had it worse cause it rained for 2 days during theirs'.

i miss my hair :(

i miss you guys too :(

2008-01-27T16:31:00.000+08:00

at last i'm out from the 'deliciously outstanding (sic)' place. but, i'll be going back i about 2 hours? time passes real fast. ahhhhhhhhh goodbye.

go HAWK coy...

2008-01-10T21:42:00.000+08:00

my hair was washed for the last time before its all snipped (yes, i prefer this to 'shave') off tomorrow. goodbye hair ):

thank you everybody who has played a part in my life this holidays, making it a meaningful and fun one before i go in! my sec 4A, mc-0, choir peeps and everybody else!

take care whether you're working, on attachment, going for a holiday and just plain slacking!

bye.

ps. sorry, the tagboard will have to wait! hahaha. i'm lazy...

2007-12-31T01:14:00.000+08:00

today is jean's birthday (HAPPY BIRTHDAY JEAN!) and she invited me to her birthday party at essential brews! thank you! (: i had great fun there. usually when the pinata is broken, the kids (not us) would usually scramble all over the place to collect the candy. BUT, 18 (and above) year-olds do it differently. it's smashed on the floor, and the candy spills out and the candy is collected and thrown at everyone. that is called a candy fight. some candy is also put into shirts and pants. hahaha. the most fun i had after grad night! hahaha. thanks jean, for this opportunity to see the bbs again! (:

oops. i hit the pinata down on the floor!

everybody

nj peeps!

2007-12-30T01:46:00.000+08:00

many FIRSTS today.

it was linus' first time
- riding a motorcycle (thanks hc for the exhilarating ride!)
- playing games in settler's cafe (very expensive for some reason)
- talking to some alumni peeps

haha, maybe not many. perhaps it was the motorcycle ride that compelled me to write about this.

goodbye yuehhsin and jiahao! take care! sigh everybody's leaving..

sometimes closeness is one-sided. you never know until you get an affirmation from the other party.

2007-12-28T16:15:00.000+08:00

so much has happened this past week. hmm. let me start with my trip to kl.

took a 5h luxury coach to klcc. stayed at impiana hotel. seriously, the shopping malls there are exact replicas of singapore's. there are departmental stores like isetan, topman, etc.. that can be found here. the price is only cheaper by a few cents. went to the newest mall called pavillion which is supposed to be upmarket; its like wisma. then there was sungei wang, which is like far east plaza. nevertheless, there were still new sights to see, like the indoor theme park in berjaya times square which has 10+ floors worth of shopping. the malaysian eye ferris wheel thingy was something worth going too. needed to take the monorail to get there. haha. quite inaccessible though. alas, it was time to go back to comfy home sweet home! bought back dunkin donuts for some people, but somehow or another i did not manage to see them. how sad.

pavillion's white christmas decor.

scenery on the eye.

hotel lobby

after my trip it was hardcore carolling! i simply love carolling with all of you. i adore everyone's voices! whether it was being a caroller or spectator, my life revolved around raffles city-dempsey road-goodwood park-sheraton for the rest of the remaining days to christmas. in fact, i've been seeing all my choir friends almost everyday. uncannily, i'd still want to; unfortunately, some have left. its delightful and enjoyable singing carols everywhere and having those crapping sessions with everyone before every carolling gig. also not forgetting going to zhirui's house almost everyday this week. haha. i'll miss the dai dee sessions!

the donuts and xq!
xy and me on the mrt.
xt and me.
xy xq and me in nydc.

couple outfit with mav.

mav zr me at dempsey road.

yuehhsin and me

zr and me

chuwen and me. congratulations! (:

some stuff happened on christmas eve and christmas day that made this christmas quite miserable for me. it hurts to know that after you sacrificed something to warn someone, the warning isn't heeded and believed. if i didn't say anything, i'm sure the situation presently would be much much better. all the shenanigan stuff should stop. i'm so glad i've got you to talk to, if not i don't know what would've happened (: anyway, all's good now with everyone! i think we should have a name for ourselves. i don't like to put "everyone" this "everyone" that when its just us. hahaha.

well, back to happy stuff. met up with my mco at the eski bar in holland on boxing day! the stupid freeze room was damn cold. had a good time playing indian poker and attempting to play the cards ben brought. what's it called? bah, i forgot. hahaha. anyway, it was just fun fun fun.

ACCOLADES for this christmas
junqi; for the card sent through the snail mail! i'll see you soon at the 4A chalet!
xiaoyun; for your lovely card! i'll give you the tys' real soon!
chengluan; for the picture that we took last christmas!
charleen & deniece; for the nike cap!!! i simply adore it! i'll wear it everyday!
soe; for the handy dandy brush holder and chocs! plus, the card!
ben; for the carlsberg and candies! although i don't drink. haha.
alee; for your heartfelt donation and card!
julian; for the extremely emotionally heartwarming photo organiser! i'll nv bear to use it. loads of memories are found inside! sorry i didn't send you off at the airport!

a blessed christmas and a happy new year to all of you out there! (:

goodbye to xianyong and zhirui!

2007-12-17T16:47:00.001+08:00

haha. this will be a long long post cause i haven't updated for nearly a month.

for the sake of convenience, grad night photos here !
happy viewing!

a big thank you to all who wished me before my h3 econs paper! sorry i didn't reply your tags on my board! all in all, i think it went well. bell curve, bell curve...

major events after the damn h3 paper:

1. 29/11 tjc concert with negativ (right after the paper lol)

it was an eye-opener! great seeing performers from other jcs. it was the first time i went to tj. boy am i glad that nj's building is what it is. 8 floors lol. there was this ball sculpture contraption in their courtyard similar to the science centre's. too bad it was out of order. at least they have an auditorium. lt5 pales in comparison.

for more, go to NEGATIV-.BLOGSPOT.COM

2. 6/12 performance at singapore arts cafe, esplanade

bella luna

a send-off for cil. i love singing without mics! a big goodbye to all scholars! will miss you guys! (:

for more, go to NEGATIV-.BLOGSPOT.COM

3. 8/12 cycling with ogls, sentosa

happy cyclists! (char hadn't learnt how to ride yet!)

more happy cyclists!

what a bad job i did; imitating that bikini babe.

i'm not havng fun.
monorail! it was my first time riding on it.

due to the stupid zouk out, the road were buzzing with lorries and vans. how irritating. all in all, it was fun; the stupid rain had to spoil it all!

okay, there's more! but i haven't gotten the photos yet. will put them up when the time is ripe (yeah right, i'm just lazy) haha.

cheers! happy holidays (:

i'll be going to KL from 18-20/12. how loser-ish. but nvm, its better than nothing!

2007-11-21T17:57:00.001+08:00

2007-11-21T17:19:00.000+08:00

boy, am i glad i only have 2 papers left.

i'm sure i'll feel sour when everybody starts shouting and screaming tomorrow after bio. i already felt like that when there was a hint of that commotion on monday after paper 3. plus, i see "close" friends of mine just walking off without me to go and celebrate. and when they saw me eventually, they just continued sauntering away. some are becoming too close until some are "neglected". i guess i've to force myself not to care about these "trifling matters". anyway, i don't think i'll see or contact any of them after tomorrow. boon or bane?

i'll find solace singing with negativ.

2007-11-15T00:57:00.001+08:00

i've got 4 more papers and i'm acting as if its the holidays already. bleh.

happy birthday soe! (:

2007-11-07T15:16:00.000+08:00

bliss.

for a week.

my most hated subject starts next week. economics. not that it's hard. just that it's a 'humanities' subject, so the marking of the essays is subjective. different teachers have their own ideology. different teachers teach different things. diferent teachers mark differently. i doubt the '2 markers to a paper' policy by cambridge doesn't solve the subjectiveness of the subject.

its hard to be the last to officially end the a's. i end on the 29th; the last paper. what subject? econs. i want at least a merit. hahahaha, i can just continue dreaming; judging from my trifling knowledge of globalisation. plus,

'is economics a science?'
'do the assumptions underlying economic theories make economics useless?'
'what do you consider a normative or positive statement in economics?'

-_-

the questions i made up;
i do not know how to answer.

and i must rant about the grossness of the bio paper. who sets 3/4 of the paper on structures and functions??? cambridge. and it was all suggest this suggest that. how horrible.

i'm idling away.

2007-11-05T14:26:00.000+08:00

every day, before an A level paper, i sleep at 4am. not because i'm a hardcore mugger.

i just can't sleep. i end up prancing around my house; lying on the living room sofa; annoying my dog; and going back to my bed. the whole 'ritual' starts from 12am and its a vicious cycle occuring almost daily, hindering my ability to have the clarity of thought while attempting the paper.

oh my. there's a double paper tomorrow and i wonder how i'll survive math, the afternoon paper. i'll be drained by then even if i just manage to catch a 3h wink.

how? i pray.

2007-10-30T13:10:00.001+08:00

18 more hours.

i hope i can picture ms champagne telling me which question to do.

Lord, be with me.

2007-09-26T18:06:00.001+08:00

haha. i swear i didn't do that myself.

i'm taking a self-declared one week break after the prelims. catching up on all the good movies that i missed.

i hope i do well.

2007-09-15T00:08:00.000+08:00

haha. i'm supposed to have my nose buried in my notes. but heck, its a friday!

one week of prelims down. one week + one day more to go. i hope i'll survive. thanks to all well-wishers! (:

life's been rather good lately.

haha ok. that's my update.

cheers.

2007-08-10T00:29:00.000+08:00

one month later. hello.

cts.
enrichment week.
choir.
syf choral closing ceremony.
swim step down.
choir senior's farewell.
my cca life has ended.

oh well, time to hit the books! its been a long journey with the choir. everytime i look back, it seems as if it was just yesterday. thank you juniors, for the lovely farewell which was heartfelt. especially the basses, who splurged on us seniors! we must have been the most blessed ones! haha. i just hope that video doesn't appear on youtube. hahaha, come to think of it, if it does, other people will be at the losing end! :p but that video was crafted beautifully. together with xy's vid, all the loose ends to my embarkment were tied up.

"kaleidoscope, kaleidoscope, a world of colours and dreams..." thinking back, yj's rendition of it still cranks me up! i'm sure it was much better than that by the arrogant soloist! closing ceremony - that day marked my last official performance with the choir. i wonder whether i will continue singing in the future. perharps with negativ-? sigh. i will miss ms lim ):

judging from my various tete-a-tete-s with people, i feel like i'm not being myself. i'm just trying too hard to be someone that i am not. that's a real life struggle. it has come to the point where i am even thinking how i was before i became this person i am now. perharps i'm really introverted, but somehow 'grew' out of it, trying to mix in with everyone and stuff. and now, the 'introverted' side is haunting me, telling me that i'm not an extrovert, that i don't really fit in with everybody, that i should scram before others tell me to.

i hope this is just a late night's random feeling.

anyway, time for more happier stuff! God is with me and He'll guide me through my entire life! (: i really am thankful to Him for the results that i got for this ct! judging from my percentile, its the best so far! (: i passed my h3! haha.

ok, i'm looking forward to my mariott hotel buffet tomorrow! haha. bye.

2007-07-10T21:19:00.000+08:00

argh.. i feel so tempted to reply to this on someone's friendster:

"hello! e guy who not only DQ but also caused someone to DQ! hahah but no worries e guy blur enough to listen to u :)"

cause i did not. did not, get dq-ed!!! but nvm, i shall not. i can imagine the replies i'll get. hahahahaha. anyway, we improved by 13s for the reswim! but it still wasn't enough. ): nationals are ending tomorrow, then it'll be back to school for me. how sad. and i heard that ms lim screwed the choir again. poor jh. don't worry, i'll be back on thursday!

some pics from enrichment week! scuba diving and chocolate making. i'm grossed out by chocolate now. i must have gotten an overdose. smelling and looking a chocolate now makes me nauseous, much less even tasting it. urghhh... scuba diving was the best!

ok, no pics, the browser isn't loading.

2007-07-06T21:16:00.001+08:00

the heats are finally over. i'm very relieved...

i didn't get last for my 100 and 200m breastroke!

hahahaha. instead, i did my personal best, of which i'm quite satisfied with myself. i'm certainly pleased with my 100m today. i improved 11 seconds relative to last year! anyway, i'm not comparing myself to those club swimmers who bag all the medals. its just for the experience, as my parents said. i need to challenge myself physically once in a while. haha. anyway, something shitty happened during my 100m today. when it was time for my heat, some guy claimed that he was assigned to my lane (lane 2) and stepped up onto the board. i complained to the officials around, but 'take your mark' was still said, and the familiar honk sound rang. so basically, i didn't swim in my heat. i had mixed emotions at that point of time. i felt relieved and happy, partly because i thought that i wouldn't have to swim anymore :p on the other hand, there was the nerves that worsened. well, in the end, i swam in heat 4 and that guy got disqualified (poor him, his timing was better than mine, but it was not even recorded in the results).

i'm looking forward to tomorrow! scuba diving! (darn! water again, in a pool somemore..) it'll be my first event of enrichment week. was supposed to go for bio conc camp but was too tired. oh yes, i thought i'd be finished swimming. but apparently due to some 'technical error', the medley relay is going to be reswum. grr....

jun jun alina me and mother!

2007-07-03T23:34:00.000+08:00

h3 econs was terrible. once the paper started, people around me started writing straight away. marianne didn't, but she wrote so fast! 2.5 sides for each 35 mark question. hahahaha. i wrote 4 sides for the h2 25 mark question. so ironic.

anyway, its my event on thursday! i believe i'll be last again because 200m is mad. i dunno why i got entered into that. its so hard to sustain! pray that i'll complete it!

just got photos of my birthday from charleen!

oh yes, i went out with alina, junqi and mother yesterday. they surprised me by giving me a birthday present! THANK YOU!! i can't believe i forgot the wang wang incident! it all seems like its yesterday, even though it has been 2 years. hahaha. it was nice to reminisce about the past! (:

hahaha. took this when i went to lot 1 with stella one day after training. apparently my face fits the body due to the correct proportions. hahaha.

2007-06-30T22:34:00.001+08:00

when i said that cts were over in the previous post, i was deluding myself. i still have a paper on tuesday! well, some people say that i got into this mess myself, but h3 econs is fun. all the cool theorems that are there for us to challenge! hahahaha.

however, there's no notes for me to study, and i seriously don't know how to answer a 35 mark essay question with my minute knowledge on game theory etc. i think i'm screwed. plus, now i'm supposed to be concentrating on nationals which are like, next week. argh....

2007-06-28T01:54:00.000+08:00

HUURRAYY!!!!

the stupid cts are over. the one that made my holidays so miserable and unfufilling. oh well, guess i'll have my own holiday now. i guess its been ingrained into my mind that holidays ALWAYS come after exams. but after coming to nj, that has almost never been the case - this year's ct1 which was pushed forward due to syf. went out with mco today! three amigos, havaianas, each-a-cup.

ok, my mind's feeling a tad purile. perharps its the after-effect of 3 continuous days of madness.

outside wheelock.

2007-06-22T23:06:00.000+08:00

is the trade-off worth it?

ok, maybe i've been studying too much of econs. the trade-off between price stability and employment etc. but its true. the trade-off between academics and social life is ever so prevalent in jc. i see total extremes in real life. one focusing on studies, and the other on socialising. well, both succeed in their forte but fail in the other. that's sad. however, there are those who can succeed in both, and i kowtow to them. well-rounders, they call them.

that brings me to the point of spending time with yourself. be it reading, sleeping etc. can you find a quiet time to spend by youself, away from the hustle and bustle of life? its good to stop, ponder and reflect about the hectic life we're leading. other than academic and social life, there is more to that. presently, i'm finding it hard to achieve a balance.

2007-06-21T15:01:00.001+08:00

Your EQ is 133

50 or less: Thanks for answering honestly. Now get yourself a shrink, quick!
51-70: When it comes to understanding human emotions, you'd have better luck understanding Chinese.
71-90: You've got more emotional intelligence than the average frat boy. Barely.
91-110: You're average. It's easy to predict how you'll react to things. But anyone could have guessed that.
111-130: You usually have it going on emotionally, but roadblocks tend to land you on your butt.
131-150: You are remarkable when it comes to relating with others. Only the biggest losers get under your skin.
150+: Two possibilities - you've either out "Dr. Phil-ed" Dr. Phil... or you're a dirty liar.

What's Your EQ (Emotional Intelligence Quotient)?

2007-06-19T21:56:00.000+08:00

its happening again.

last year might repeat itself.

i don't want to be hurt again.

its wrong.

:(

wake up, linus.

2007-05-21T22:39:00.000+08:00

i don't know whether

i still love choir

i still love my choirmates

i still love my choir friends

i love studies

i still love my classmates

i still love my clique.

some stuff gets on my nerves which makes me want to explode.

2007-05-09T20:30:00.000+08:00

oh yes! i forgot to thank all those who's well-wishes were forgotten in the previous post! those encouraging messages really rahrah-ed me up! (: to zee, yuxin, jaf, tiff, soe, julian, marianne, char, alee and stella. thanks for all the support! (:

i'm actually feeling very troubled right now. if choir really gets into the closing ceremony (1/2 probability that we will, since hc performed the last one), i think i'll really be stressed cause i'm in the nationals. i dunno whether i should really just quit. i want to perform for the closing ceremony too if we're chosen. it'll be such a great opportunity to bond and have fun. but i'm worried about my studies. and my parents think that i'll be free to study right after cantab. oh man. how did i handle this the last time in fairfield? in any case, i'm in such a dilemma.

2007-05-08T21:48:00.000+08:00

first and foremost, my heartfelt gratitude to my basses who did me proud today, 8th may 2007 at the syf central judging competition of choirs. conan, yong jian, ling chung, amos, zi jiang, jensen, xingqun, jiahao, we deserve what we got! i would like to thank jiahao and xq the most for helping me to handle and teach the basses well, until we were (are still) in tip-top condition and ms lim's "best section in nj choir". my face always beamed (s) with a smile whenever she said that. i know we are all fighters and we pull through each performance well.

having said that, the whole nj choir deserves the most credit as we all came together as a team and worked as one. it made the experience on stage all the more lively and homely. sanctus was sung with much exuberance and kodomo was just playful. we were amazing.

miss lim's 'good' after sanctus and 'very good' after kodoma made the syf experience worthwhile. its been a long time ever since she said that, and waves of emotions just came over me. i'm sure many of you felt the same way.

congratulations,
nj choir.

GOLD WITH HONOURS.

we deserve it.

2007-04-08T21:33:00.000+08:00

one more month.

STRESS.

2007-03-15T20:45:00.000+08:00

i'm apprehensive of what's to come next week. results and all. will i be disappointed and discontented when i get them back? after all, i studied real hard. and by real hard, i mean real hard. but not to the extent of a muggers point of view whereby 'real hard' means memorising everything in the notes. i know i studied hard because this is (hopefully was) the first (hopefully last) time when i had all the symptoms of stress. even though i kept on denying to my parents about feeling stressed (i deluded myself into thinking i didn't have it too), the symptoms gave it all away. nose-bleeds, heart palpitations, heart/chest pain, difficulty in breathing, et cetera.

i feared for my life cause when i was in delusion, thoughts of dying early due to a sudden 'heart attack' appeared. reading the newspapers about the sudden surge of people dying due to these 'heart attacks' even though they have had a clean medical record. and yes, i thought that perharps they experienced those minor attacks (would angina suffice?) and kept it all to themselves. hence, nobody knew what the real cause was, cause they didn't live to tell their tale.
i felt that i was studying my life away. literally scraping pieces of flesh off me everytime i buried my nose into my notes. it was tough studying this hard for, as what i call it, a pathetic common test.

this fear of not improving from last year's common test and promos just grips my heart.

please God, stay with me.

hehe. on a lighter note, happy belated birthday jiahao! from your tag, i can see that you like the present very much! :p

oh yes, i haven't been replying my tags! so sorry! i shall do it now-right from where i left it. anyway, does my tagboard really have a problem? on firefox, i only can't see where to write the tag. but you can navigate it. its just beside the post button. on ie, i only can't see where the post button is. haha, just keep on clicking on the space beside the tag box and hopefully it'll be posted! (:

tag replies;
soph: hey thanks alot for everything! whoever the sexy loser is...
luan: thanks for your well-wishes! i'm really glad we won talentime! (:
nat: hmm, it seems as if we do't know each other already...
sam: hey i hope cts were fine for you! i'm glad that its all over!
jiahao: wah, you post alot lehhhh. i reply one by one la, since i'm your nice SL. hahaha. [pause] oh i shall only reply the most recent one. hahaha. yes. very long, very long. thanks!
claudia: hahaha. hello!

haha. i feel bad having to reply to stuff way back during orientation. haha. oops.

have a good day everyone! (:

2007-03-14T21:21:00.000+08:00

i just watched something real metaphorical last night on arts central. since it was screened on national tv, i don't see any harm repeating it here.

shots were taken from interviews with a botanist commenting on the Garden City project and a drama director commenting on the failure of the local Arts scene. it went like this, one after the other in the exact same sequence:

1.
botanist: we (the government) want to beautify the place by planting trees along the road.
director: they (the government) beautified the arts scene by building the Esplanade.

2.
botanist: we took the initiative to import trees from foreign countries instead of using local trees like angsana.
director: most of the shows at Esplanade are not local (imported). they are UFOs that come and stage their shows, and leave after sucking the money out of audiences.

3.
botanist: each tree is planted correctly.
director: singaporeans have been processed to become planted like trees of the same height.

the 3rd scene was to explain how there's this 'model singaporean' that everybody ought to be, and everybody will be copies of each other, which is compared to the plants which are of the same height.

this is roughly the gist of it. i really take my hat off to those who made the show. quite bold of them actually.

oh yes. take note: watch 300. don't watch the history boys if you're not british.

that's it guys. its officially 4 more days to horror. come to think of it, my hols are quite horrible already.

ah.. demented.

2007-03-12T20:48:00.000+08:00

the 'school holidays' have finally arrived. just what i needed.

bio spa during the holidays? sigh. njc njc njc.....

i guess i should be exhilarated knowing that i do not have to go back to school on sunday.

i find it extremely difficult to blog knowing full well that its dull and boring to pen a detailed illustration of my days. hitherto, not much of my posts have been my thoughts. its funny how many thoughts come to me when i'm not on the com and when the latter happens, the former doesn't take place.

oh well, i've got the week to get back my sane life, lest i become non compos mentis.

hello world.

2007-03-08T22:24:00.000+08:00

COMMON TESTS ARE FINALLY OVER.

B FOR CHINESE A'S. I'M FULLY CONTENTED.

BUT.

I BELIEVE CHOIR SHOULD NOT START FULL-SCALE RIGHT AFTER CTS. IS THERE NO BREAK AT ALL?

I BELIEVE 12-4PM IS ALREADY TIRING ENOUGH WITHOUT ANY EXTENSION.

I BELIEVE SUCH EXTENSIONS SHOULD NOT BE BASED ON SOMETHING AS RIDICULOUS AS A SMALL MINORITY GOING FOR A CONCERT.

SMALL, AS IN REAL SMALL.

PERIOD.

2007-02-19T16:33:00.000+08:00

boy, days just keep passing in a blink of an eye. its already chinese new year! before that was valentine's day and chinese new year celebrations in school!

i would like to thank everyone who gave me something on valentines! (:

choir performed as usual on during cny celebrations so my hopes of ponning were dashed. oh well, there's always that wee little bit of hope isn't it? to my classmates: thanks for shouting 'chong en' yeah? hahaha. nobody calls me that! other than some choir jokers... haha. anyway, congrats xy for winning the 1st prize of talentime! you deserve it! hahaha. i've got a sneak preview of the trophy :p

my cheap thrill! hahaha.

met up with some mco people and the touch ruggers after the celebrations. we decided to go bugis' billy bombers because julian had some vouchers. ate a one-for-one meal and the portions were huge as usual! was bloated after that. :x

thereafter, we headed to this obscure place in bugis called haji street/lane/road or whatever. hadn't heard of that place before, but alee and julian had. hmm, i wonder why.. botiques and cafes occupying old shophouses lined both sides of the street/lane/road. some were high-end some weren't. there was this cool shop in which it looked like a replica from a mission impossible set. if you're streetsmart, you'll know the prices of the goods sold in the shop. haha. went home with a bad of purchases. contented? yes indeed.

oh yes, i became a member of this 'icon' shopping mall beside bugis junction. it was some lucky dip thing and i won 1 year of free membership. adeline got it too. haha.

06s07 all the way!

2007-02-11T22:19:00.001+08:00

there is no such thing as "fate". God gave all His children many wonderful gifts when He created us - high on the list being our FREEWILL.

the reason God has given us all this gift of Freewill is that He wants our Love, and Love, of course, can never be forced but must be given freely. puppets can't love, nor can we be "fated" to Love!

having Freewill means that we are completely free in the choices we make in our lives and thus are responsible for those choices and their consequences - up to and including our Salvation. using "fate" as an explanation for negative things in our lives and/or for the absence of positive things in our lives is a "cop-out" - like someone trying to say that he was "fated" to have alcohol/drug problems before being rescued by the Lord.

that being said, not having "true love", a "big car", a "big income", etc. are not necessarily bad things - Spiritually speaking. stuff like that can come between us and God.

just a thought. anyway, more photos of talentime! (: courtesy of marianne!

Bo5 gp group 3!

2007-02-08T20:20:00.000+08:00

A BIG THANK YOU TO ALL WHO MADE TALENTIME 2007 EXTREMELY ENJOYABLE! (:

especially my fan club!! hahaha.

NEGATIV-
1ST IN VOCAL GROUP CATEGORY!

to my fans: (lol!) thanks for the flowers!!!! (((((:

my fan club!! hahaha!

zoo zoo club!

also, a big thank you to all who came to support me and offered me words of encouragement! (:

and lastly, a video to brighten your day! haha. trust me, it brightened mine! lol.

2007-01-28T17:09:00.000+08:00

haha, in case you're wondering why the sudden appearance of posts below this one, i added it today, to record important events. (:

undoubtedly, this whole week has been extremely stressful for me. i'm sad to say it, but i think i keep on blaming choir for it. i can't believe myself - staying in the grey surroundings for a freaking 15 hours. its overwhelming, is it not? unable to understand lectures due to the lack of concentration due to the lack of sleep. i want to study. i want to do my homework. but there is insufficient time.

how am i supposed to feel when i end at 5.20pm while others end at 11.40am? is that a good reason to be more restless and tired?

how am i supposed to feel when i see my classmates going out after school at 1.20pm, while i have to stay in school to rot till 5?

how am i supposed to feel when its not my fault, but i'm still being blamed?

haha. we're all humans. so its natural for us to feel this way. i just wanna say thanks to all my real friends to listen to me when i wanna rant. i don't really like the idea of having fake friends for the sake of having company in school. its plastic.

i really hope we win talentime, and pull through syf with a good ranking.
if not all the sacrifices made will not be worth it.

2007-01-22T23:51:00.000+08:00

HAPPY BIRTHDAY BEN!

we blindfolded the unsuspecting bobo, causing quite a spectacle outside the library. haha. thereafter, heading all the way to covo, behind nj, during which we faced many 'obstacles' like running for the 'bus'. haha! pictures. enjoy!

THE PROCESS OF BLINDFOLDING!

BEAUTIFULLY DECORATED WALL BY THE GIRLS

GROUP!

2007-01-19T23:04:00.000+08:00

yujia, i've officially known you for 7 years - including your crescent days! hahaha. we went to balcony at theheerenshops to celebrate her birthday. thanks to char and soe to went there early to decorate the place!

2007-01-14T16:48:00.000+08:00

orientation 2007.
the adventure ended.

2007-01-10T21:27:00.000+08:00

thanks OG 13! (:

odessey 2007 has been a blast so far! how i wish orientation could be longer. better make the most out of the 2 days left! haha.

anyway, this is the first entry of the year, so...

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

haha, i know its a bit late, and this is probably the umpteenth blog you've seen that has this. haha. tradition i suppose? urgh, reminds me of pw. okok. end of topic.

now i'm ogl-ing OG 7 (hmm, its ogling without the hyphen, and no, i'm not ogling at OG 7), and they rock too! i'm so envious of their orientation this year cause they have many opportunities to bond. for instance, from the external hunt today, i could see more people talking to each other and stuff. so, that's great!

it'll be tough to catch up on one week's work, but all in all, its worth it.

goodbye.

have fun and take care in ns! (:

2006-12-31T23:08:00.000+08:00

church camp rocked! (:

BLESSED IN JESUS! matt 5:3-10

what a good way to end the year. it would have been a better ending if i'd went for omega night, but i'm not ready to have a public reflection for the year. cause i'll be lying through my teeth if i said that my year was 'happy'. no, i didn't have a good year. i'd consider those months good, but examining it closer, perharps 'lousy' would be a much better word. what a mess did i get into, what shitsu happened...

anyway, my resolution would be to walk closer with God, cause he lifted my every burden.

2007 is approaching in less than a hour. are you ready for the new year? Odyssey awaits me.

i needed some time to be alone, so sorry choir peeps, who are watching the fireworks at the esplanade now!

But it goes against the way I am,
To put my human nature down
And let the Spirit take control of all I do;
'Cause when those trials come,
My human nature shouts the thing to do,
And God's soft prompting can be easily ignored.

thank you Lord.

2006-12-28T00:20:00.001+08:00

con·tent
/kənˈtɛnt/ [kuhn-tent]
–adjective
satisfied with what one is or has; not wanting more or anything else.

am i?

2006-12-25T23:21:00.001+08:00

A BLESSED CHRISTMAS EVERYONE!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY CHARMAINE!
haha, i just came back from her house. her party was so fun! cause bridge was played! nah, haha. thanks for the party! (: soph, you were missed. get better soon!

my church service was yesterday and the usual from my class went out after that. we decided to watch 'a night in the mueseum'. thanks yinling for the treat! (: i think the item that we performed was ok. just that people told me that they couldn't hear me. hmm. how could that be? must be the mics. hahaha.

anyway, for the carolling today at sheraton, forgetful me did not have my blazer cause i had left it at gallery hotel. thanks xq for helping me to bring it to the choir store. but i didn't have it. so, thanks hg for coming down to pass it to me! had lunch with my parents (they came to support me!) at newton food centre (the place where you said you'll treat me) then i went home to prepare for the party.

Christmas didn't even feel like Christmas. maybe because i didn't go to town? nah. Jesus said that he would be coming to earth when everything is going on as usual - when marriages, parties, sleep, baths etc are going on. so Christmas was fun! (:

thanks everyone for the fabulous presents! maybe shoutouts another day? cause there's ogl camp tomorrow and i'm going to be a zombie if i don't sleep now. (i've got to reach school by 7am) freak.

bye!

i'll pretend nothing happened

and yes, HAPPY BIRTHDAY LORD JESUS.

2006-12-24T00:01:00.000+08:00

this hit me.

"to those people who are against homosexuals, and crack jokes about 'dykes' and 'gay fags'. please stop and think for a moment about the daily torture these people go through. they can't tell their parents because they'll disappoint them. they can't tell their friends because they'll lose them. they can never tell their bosses or their religious leaders, because they will be fired or ex-communicated, cut off from the community as though they had a contagious disease. how is that fair? how is that Christian?
and worst of all, for the homosexual who believes in God: the God who made them, is supposedly now the God that damns them. the God they love is the God who curses them to hell, to eternal death. do you think for even a moment that they want that?"

it sounds damn right.

anyway, tag replies;

jen; oh. i meant that at night, that coridoor is dark and scary. haha. i've heck care-d many many times already.
char; yeah! mco party rocked! thankss!!
roman; hey i am usually but there are exceptions.. haha. merry christmas too!
stella; sigh, i think i was pms-ing so i said that. don't take it to heart.
nat; thanks for the party!
luan; hahaha! yeah i loved standing next to you too! (: seeya on christmas!
roy; yes they make us stronger!!! see you too!
hilary; heyyy! you're back in singapore? hahaha. if you're referring to what's on the right panel, that's in 2007! haha. see you in church tml!! (:

i just came back from the mco christmas party at soe's house!!! i'm so glad i went, cause i could not make it initially, so i rushed there after my grandad's birthday party. the fingerfood was good and so was the island creamery dessert!!! ok, i'm feeling abit high now. hahaha. then there was presents exchange! my favourite part! haha. thanks everyone for the lovely presents!!! ((((: i feel so blessed to have so many friends in class. i think God paved the way for us to be in the same class, and i really thank Him for that. appreciate appreciate appreciate.

phpps meeting tml with mr michael chan. need to wake up early. argh.
goodnight everyone.

I was losing myself to somebody else
But now I see
I don't wanna pretend
So this is the end of you and me
Cause the 'girl' that you want
'She' was tearing us apart
Cause 'she's' everything
Everything I'm not

2006-12-23T00:22:00.000+08:00

the events that happened just forces me to go closer with God. and i find that i really really need him in times of these trials. i've struggled with it again and again, but this time, it feels different, perharps due to the stuff that went on. my relationship with God has always been the basic and comfortable one. He's always there when i need him and i can go to Him in times of trouble. mankind is like that. we're sinful my nature. you do not know how to treasure something until something bad happens - i think some chinese idiom says something like that. hence, i'm sure every Christian has experienced this - ignoring God when you're living a life of bliss, and going back to Him when you are having difficulty with your life. as i mentioned earlier, i'm at a comfortable level with God. i don't think i've been through crossing my comfort zone because i think i'm not up to that level yet. when i read a cell group's blog, i shudder at the thought of learning what they are learning because i think its too intellectual for the people of their age.

i guess i'm still a baby, in the spiritual sense. i yearn to be closer to Him but there are just so many things in this world that keeps me drifted away. things that i ponder on for so long, and try and try and try to make things right, but to no avail. i may pray with all my might and strength. Lord, is this really not for me? my dad used to say that everything would be according to His own perfect timing. i'm still blurry on what happened because everything seemed to blank me out. i just want to make things the way it was.

on a lighter note (were the above paragraphs heavy? haha), i learnt how to kayak properly and not puke (argh, horrors of the sec 4 council camp gave me a phobia on kayaking), or maybe it was just the sturdiness of the person behind me. and, hmm, 1 star? haha. plus, carolling session today and the outing rocked, except for the fact that i came down with a flu and couldn't emcee.

oh yes, the carolling session at amk hospital warmed my heart. it really gave me great satisfaction to sing and to see everybody enjoy and appreciate it. thumbs up to luan for organising this! (:

Friends always show their love.
What are brothers for if not to share troubles?
Proverbs 17:17

2006-12-18T23:14:00.000+08:00

i didn't know being a church camp group leader was going to be so serious! sigh. i've got a feeling i won't enjoy the camp at all. being allocated to someone isn't really that exciting. second service is going through some changes too. i am not looking forward to it at all. more responsibilities and more work. i just feel like leaving...

things always start to change before the new year.

the only thing i enjoy now is carolling. yes, with the choir. i guess i'm really bonded with them now. anyway, i haven't seen my classmates for 2 whole months, so yeah, things change.

sec 4 class chalet? hmm. i don't wanna go there and look like a mugger. after all, i'm in an 'uncool' jc, even though i may be proud of it. i've thought about it for a while, and i guess i wouldn't want to meet any of my classmates. the first i hear from their mouths are: "how is nj", and i would have to say what i always say. the usual response? "yes, i love it there!" yes, i really do love it. but compared to them, maybe they're better off. its really the ac culture. something that fairfield had, which i lost after being in nj for 1 year. i see them all happy and dressing up and going out most of the time, which was what i did in fairfield. but for me, that "magic" is all gone.

all gone. hence i say, lead a new life linus.

sorry for being melancholic and most importantly, a humbug. after all, christmas is in 6 days. i dare say, church dampens the mood of christmas. i feel pressurised, which isn't good at all.

i pledge no allegiance.

Leave me alone
Get out of my face
I'm tired of love
Feeling so misplaced
Time for you to go
'Cause I know I'm better off on my own, oh
Leave me alone

2006-12-15T00:38:00.000+08:00

Give everyone what you owe him,
if respect, then respect;
if honor then honor.

Romans 13:7

Pulau Tinggi was enchanting and charming. alluring to a certain extent. but it was all a facade. deep within the jungle lurked the perilous track of cliffs, vines, and branches. urgh! walked through mangrove swamps and sharp rocks along the perimeter of the island. my poor feet ached tremendously after that. well, all in all, it was a good learning experience. jusco was only 1h and we couldn't really do much. and boy, i thought that there were loads of free time. only to realise that it was only that 1 hour that we had free. the rest was on the bus-you call that free? but one thing i appreciate the bus ride for, was that i learnt how to play bridge! haha. ironic isn't it? building a bridge, and learning how to play bridge. ok, its lame. haha.

photos are up!

06s07 +mc-o! alee, me, ben and yuyan!

1/4 group.

mine's and ben's shoes. we just left it there without giving them a decent burial. oh well, mud, sand, swampy+mangrove+sea water. :x

ben me and alee on the deck of the boat!

wind.

messy bedroom
the scary un-lit corridoor at night
huts of the resort.

the powder-sand beach which all of us wanted to build sandcastles on! we wanted to stay there all day, but "time" did not "permit".

2006-12-14T01:44:00.000+08:00

guess where this is?

haha. its actually the last kampong in singapore. looks like malaysia eh? haha. i went there to explore with my parents. i went to the zoo too! (:

orang utans line up the tree! its damn cute.
they look like humans.

ciao!

2006-12-09T00:53:00.000+08:00

just returned home from SLO's ALL THAT JAZZ. it was a great experience and exposure! too bad i'm not performing tomorrow, cause i'm going......

to the land of jusco's! hahaha. cip in malaysia to build a bridge. it's going to be quite slack i think. cause we're even going to the new jusco. haha. i just went there 2 weeks ago. i'll be there from friday to monday. my phone will still be on, so if there's anything, just contact me. goodbye everyone! (:

light the fire again...

2006-12-07T00:36:00.000+08:00

tag replies;
zee; hey, take care in korea! have loads of fun!
junqi; hi! having fun?
yujia; thanks! i will and already am! hahahahaha. anyway, i can't wait for the Christmas party!
rachel; yoohoo! it'll be 1st 3 months again next year!
luan; haha, that happened before. but i revived it! YES DEATH TO KBK!! PLEASE DON'T EVER COME BACK.
jiahao; thanks! jiayou!
jensen; why you go back malaysia!!!!!!!! hahaha. i miss you lol!
wanling; hi! is choir fun?
yuehhsin; ok, at least for the time being, there isn't much to settle for the walk-in com. the changes are cancelled, thank goodness!
stella; yes i haven't spoken to you! anyway, we'll being seeing each other 3d 2n!

Christmas is coming, the geese are getting fat............

bye roman!!! see you next year! (:

2006-12-05T23:18:00.000+08:00

soe's in camp.
charleen and julian's in boston.
yuehhsin's going to taiwan.
and the rest are busy.

and now there's going to be a change in the script.

it'll just be the death of me.

2006-12-05T01:10:00.000+08:00

i need my moments of oblivion.

i think grad night was ecstatic. well, maybe for me, cause its not really my grad night, and i was with seniors. people whom i always feel comfortable with. it has always been that way ever since secondary school. and when its my turn to become the senior batch, there will always be that feeling of emptiness. it also hurts to have people leave.

anyway, back to grad night. haha. i wasn't part of it, but courtesy of dorea, i had free food. it was held at the exact same place where i had my founder's day dinner a few months ago, but somehow the food tasted better. probably because the poor performers only had cai4 fan4 from the canteen stall. the dishes were exactly the same from what i had during the choir camp 2 days ago, so i totally lost my appetite. thus, lousy hotel food=appealing + appetising.

negativ performed well. i'm proud of what we've had done so far. and kudos to everyone cause we were so tired after singing for 12 hours everyday for the past week. bye zr!

cocolatte's performance was ok. but i guess we were not ready to perform at that kind of place yet. plus, i don't think i'm suited for it. we left after performing cause i think the atmosphere was a bit overbearing.

we went to liang court's 24h macs from 2-4am. and we were all freaked out by what we saw. the place was swarming with gays. i found it really really disgusting. zr xq and xy who were touching each other really didn't help. yours truly was one for their victims. and when cil came, there was this sense of relief. i wonder why too. haha. maybe because he was bigger than us.

stayed at gallery hotel until 12, then i left with soph. hmm. my internal clock has gone all haywire and my resistance level, i presume, has gone down. its time for viruses to attack!

i don't think i'll have any energy left to type about the choir camp. but overall, i had fun! the com rocked! i'm becoming closer to my batch so its a comforting thing.

i still need my moments of oblivion.

2006-11-30T01:01:00.000+08:00

i'm going to be very busy for the week, so this'll be my last post before grad night.

it'll just be some of my thoughts. sorry if my english has gone haywire. its 1.

today, after the sajc workshop, negativ went to the kfc at ps to eat dinner. as usual, zr and jh were spouting their normal vulgarities. haha. while a bible study group was sitting next to us. i guess we were talking loudly about choir politics, when one of the women from the 4 member group 'shh-ed' us and gave us a grotesque look. well i was quite pissed at first, cause firstly, she had no right to do that to us. and secondly, they should go to somewhere quieter, like their church, which is most likely wmc. i just didn't like that women's attitude. anyway, i guess when i thought it through, we should have respected them and kept our volume down. but we left in the end.

this brings me to this. i know its a bit off topic, but yeah...

many christians act all holy,righteous, pious etc. some are true whereas many are not. in fact, the majority are all rotten inside, pretending to me what they are not. i find it nauseating when people who are like that are chosen to be bible study leaders and what not. well, they must first be right with God before accepting such a perilous task. just pray that they know what they're doing.

ave gratia plena, Dominus tecum.

2006-11-29T00:07:00.000+08:00

negativ-

2006-11-28T23:38:00.000+08:00

since i haven't posted pictures in a long time, i shall now. comic relief i guess, from this emotional turbulence, convulsion, turmoil and upheaval. hahahaha.

benjamin siow, tit for tat!!!

some pics of my one day malaysia trip on the 19th. haha.

kellong! floating fish farm.

so i won't give up
no i won't break down
sooner than it seems life turns around
and i will be strong
even if it all goes wrong
when i'm standing in the dark i'll still believe
someone's watching over me

i miss you guys.

thanks zee.

2006-11-27T01:10:00.000+08:00

why why why.

why must i even think about it?

royston, together with other seniors came back for choir on friday. it felt great to be standing next to him and singing. it reminded me of the days last year. days of my first encounter with the nj choir. days of wanting to be able to break the dsa contract. days when i didn't know anybody.

it was one of the rare feelings that didn't remind me about anything related to a particular someone, cause i guess i was still 'innocent' then. cause i think most of my nj memories would be drenched (or rather, soiled) with childish and ignorant mistakes which i made.

well, all the best for your fun-filled holiday,
which doesn't have me inside.

2006-11-23T21:21:00.000+08:00

i made this myself. reality bites.

timeline of a friendship with regard to phone conversations

A's question: hey, wanna talk?

B's answer:

ok, sure, why not?

then,

yeah! i wanna talk to you too! (:

after a while,

ok, can.

after a long while,

ok, anything.

soon,

maybe for a shortwhile?

then comes,

oh, i'm busy. sorry.

finally,

we have nothing to talk about.

anyway,

it hurts.

2006-11-22T13:30:00.000+08:00

4ever
The Veronicas

Here we are so what you gonna do?
Do I gotta spell it out for you?
I can see that you got all the plans for tonight
But I don’t really care

Size me up you know I beat the best
Tick tock no time to rest
Let them say what they wanna say
But tonight I just don’t really care

Come on baby we aint gonna live forever
Let me show you all the things that we could do
You know you wanna be together
And I wanna spend the night with you
Yeah, yeah with you, yeah, yeah
so Come with me tonight
We could make the night last forever

I’ve seen it all I’ve got nothing to prove
Come on baby just make your move
Follow me lets leave it all behind tonight
Like we just don’t care

Let me take you on the ride of your life
That’s what I said alright
They can say what they wanna say
Cause tonight I just don’t really care

Come on baby we gonna aint live forever
Let me show you all the things that we could do
You know you wanna be together
And I wanna spend the night with you
Yeah, yeah with you yeah, yeah
Come with me tonight
We could make the night last forever

Lets pretend you’re mine
We could just pretend, we could just pretend, yeah yeah
You got what I like
You got what I like, I got what you like
Oh come on
Just one taste and you’ll want more

So tell me what your waiting for

Come on baby we gonna aint live forever
Let me show you all the things that we could do
You know you wanna be together
And I wanna spend the night with you
Yeah, yeah, with you, yeah, yeah
So come with me tonight
We could make the night last forever

2006-11-21T16:53:00.000+08:00

have you ever loved somebody so much
~~it makes you cry~~

have you ever needed something so bad
you can't sleep at night

have you ever tried to find the words
but they don't come out right

have you ever been in love
been in love so bad
you'd do anything to make them understand

have you ever had someone steal your heart away
you'd give anything to make them feel the same

have you ever searched for words to get you in their heart
but you don't know what to say
and you don't know where to start

have you ever found the one
you've dreamed of all of your life
you'd do just about anything to look into their eyes

have you finally found the one you've given your heart to
only to find that one won't give their heart to you

have you ever closed your eyes and
dreamed that they were there

and all you can do is wait for the day when they will care

2006-11-10T20:42:00.000+08:00

seems that our op fell on the same day in a different year eh hg? i took this from your blog without your permission. well, i'm reproducing it for you, so don't scold me.

She looked so sweet the first time i saw her. I saw the promise of what was to come in her eyes, the optimism in her smile, and i knew i had to work hard to get her. She was all i wanted, i thought. I would be so happy with her. The weeks passed and i grew more and more enamoured with her charms. I couldn't imagine passing a week without her presence. Everything was looking good for me and her.

However the warning signs appeared after awhile. She seemed colder, more distant, unenthusiastic. Being with her became more and more an obligation and not enjoyment. After knowing her better i realised she had many unpleasant character traits which really pricked me; only a little at first, but as time passed it grew into a constant irritation at the back of my mind. What was happening to my 'one and only'? I felt betrayed.

Our relationship started deteriorating at a greater and greater pace. Harried msn chats late at night, countless hours of worrying and sleepless nights dampened my spirits and brought me to new lows. I remember clearly how we ended it. I gave her a speech, long and logical, staight to her face. And i smiled while doing it. PW and me have finally broken up, but it's ok. She was a bitch anyway.

2006-10-22T21:57:00.000+08:00

its the end of the world.
as what ben always sings.

i couldn't agree more.

yes. people are getting irritated at me for complaining about my results.
yes. i am getting irritated at others for complainig about their results.
yes. nobody's happy with their results. even those with 4 As are complaining about how they could've gotten a high A.

its a vicious cycle, mind you.

i dreamt that i got a heart attack last night,
it couldn't have been more real.

2006-10-17T22:59:00.000+08:00

things are looking bleak.
literally.
with the haze and answer sheets.

anyway, it seems like tagboard's acquired by some company, so i'll remove the link.

2006-10-10T13:19:00.000+08:00

im in fishball's house doing pw now.

its the bane of my existence.

2006-10-09T18:42:00.000+08:00

i failed my grade 8 piano.

fsck it.

2006-09-16T12:15:00.000+08:00

darn there's something wrong with blogger.can't change my add. hmm. i shall reply my tags which have been there for months. sorry guys!

hg; haha. yeah it does, but how much can i cheat? hahaha.
tiff; hey. thanks!!! (:
rhoda; hello! i dont visit so often also! so its a near-accurate counter! haha. yeah i did!
mavis; hey you're welcome! glad you enjoyed it!
luan; hahaha. i'd love to smile. and i updated! haha.
zee; you smile yourself too! don't get discouraged over thinking you don't understand this and that. but you must know that there are other people who don't get it too.

i'm going to mos bpp with stella to study! i love that girl. she helps me understand everything! haha. (:

can't lose what i never had.

2006-09-16T12:14:00.000+08:00

It's about an essay written by a teenage boy called "The Room". I hate the thought of what my file room will look like. May you be as moved and blessed as I was when I read it.

THE ROOM
17-year-old Brian Moore had only a short time to write something for a class. The subject was what Heaven was like.
"I wowed 'em," he later told his father, Bruce. "It's a killer. It's the bomb. It's the best thing I ever wrote.."
It also was the last. Brian's parents had forgotten about the essay when a cousin found it while cleaning out the teenager's locker at Teary Valley High School Brian had been dead only hours, but his parents desperately wanted every piece of his life near them-notes from classmates and teachers, his homework.
Only two months before, he had handwritten the essay about encountering Jesus in a file room full of cards detailing every moment of the teen's life. But it was only after Brian's death that Beth and Bruce Moore realized that their son had described his view of heaven.
"It makes such an impact that people want to share it. You feel like you are there." Mr. Moore said. Brian Moore died May 27, 1997, the day after Memorial Day. He was driving home from a friend's house when his car went off Bulen-Pierce Road in Pickaway County and struck a utility pole. He emerged from the wreck unharmed but stepped on a downed power line and was electrocuted.
The Moores framed a copy of Brian's essay and hung it among the family portraits in the living room. "I think God used him to make a point. I think we were meant to find it and make something out of," Mrs. Moore said of the essay. She and her husband want to share their son's vision of life after death. "I'm happy for Brian. I know he's in heaven. I know I'll see him."

Brian's Essay: The Room...

In that place between wakefulness and dreams, I found myself in the room. There were no distinguishing features except for the one wall covered with small index card files. They were like the ones in libraries that list titles by author or subject in alphabetical order. But these files, which stretched from floor to ceiling and seemingly endless in either direction, had very different headings. As I drew near the wall of files, the first to catch my attention was one that read "Girls I have liked." I opened it and began flipping through the cards. I quickly shut it, shocked to realize that I recognized the names written on each one.

And then without being told, I knew exactly where I was. This lifeless room with its small files was a crude catalog system for my life. Here were written the actions of my every moment, big and small, in a detail my memory couldn't match. A sense of wonder and curiosity, coupled with horror, stirred within me as I began randomly opening files and exploring their content. Some brought joy and sweet memories; others a sense of shame and regret so intense that I would look over my shoulder to see if anyone was watching.

A file named "Friends" was next to one marked "Friends I have betrayed." The titles ranged from the mundane to the outright weird "Books I Have Read," "Lies I Have Told," "Comfort I have Given," "Jokes I Have Laughed at." Some were almost hilarious in their exactness: "Things I've yelled at my brothers." Others I couldn't laugh at: "Things I Have Done in My Anger", "Things I Have Muttered Under My Breath at My Parents."

I never ceased to be surprised by the contents.Often there were many more cards than I expected. Sometimes fewer than I hoped. I was overwhelmed by the sheer volume of the life I had lived. Could it be possible that I had the time in my years to fill each of these thousands or even millions of cards? But each card confirmed this truth. Each was written in my own handwriting. Each signed with my signature.When I pulled out the file marked "TV Shows I have watched", I realized the files grew to contain their contents The cards were packed tightly, and yet after two or three yards, I hadn't found the end of the file. I shut it,shamed, not so much by the quality of shows but more by the vast time I knew that file represented. When I came to a file marked "Lustful Thoughts," I felt a chill run through my body. I pulled the file out only an inch, not willing to test its size and drew out a card. I shuddered at its detailed content.I felt sick to think that such a moment had been recorded.

An almost animal rage broke on me. One thought dominated my mind: No one must ever see these cards! No one must ever see this room! I have to destroy them!" In insane frenzy I yanked the file out. Its size didn't matter now. I had to empty it and burn the cards. But as I took it at one end and began pounding it on the floor, I could not dislodge a single card. I became desperate and pulled out a card, only to find it as strong as steel when I tried to tear it.Defeated and utterly helpless, I returned the file to its slot. Leaning my forehead against the wall, I let out a long, self-pitying sigh.

And then I saw it.. The title bore "People I Have Shared the Gospel With." The handle was brighter than those around it, newer, almost unused. I pulled on its handle and a small box not more than three inches long fell into my hands. I could count the cards it contained on one hand.And then the tears came. I began to weep. Sobs so deep that they hurt. They started in my stomach and shook through me. I fell on my knees and cried. I cried out of shame, from the overwhelming shame of it all.

The rows of file shelves swirled in my tear-filled eyes. No one must ever, ever know of this room. I must lock it up and hide the key. But then as I pushed away the tears, I saw Him.No, please not Him. Not here. Oh, anyone but Jesus. I watched helplessly as He began to open the files and read the cards. I couldn't bear to watch His response. And in the moments I could bring myself to look at His face, I saw a sorrow deeper than my own.He seemed to intuitively go to the worst boxes. Why did He have to read every one? Finally He turned and looked at me from across the room. He looked at me with pity in His eyes. But this was a pity that didn't anger me. I dropped my head, covered my face with my hands and began to cry again. He walked over and put His arm around me. He could have said so many things. But He didn't say a word. He just cried with me.

Then He got up and walked back to the wall of files. Starting at one end of the room, He took out a file and, one by one, began to sign His name over mine on each card. "No!" I shouted rushing to Him. All I could find to say was "No, no," as I pulled the card from Him. His name shouldn't be on these cards. But there it was, written in red so rich, so dark, so alive. The name of Jesus covered mine. It was written with His blood. He gently took the card back. He smiled a sad smile and began to sign the cards. I don't think I'll ever understand how He did it so quickly, but the next instant it seemed I heard Him close the last file and walk back to my side.He placed His hand on my shoulder and said, "It is finished." I stood up, and He led me out of the room. There was no lock on its door. There were still cards to be written.

"I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me."-Philippians 4:13
"For God so loved the world that He gave His only son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish but have eternal life." John 3: 16

2006-09-16T11:55:00.000+08:00

swim nationals

2006-09-06T16:25:00.000+08:00

hmm. ben's tradition to take a pic with our chinese teacher!

choir senior/junior com bonding.

2006-09-06T16:15:00.000+08:00

some pics of founder's day 2006//

2006-08-23T22:12:00.000+08:00

What do you want from me?
Do you want my love?
Or do you want my friendship?

You confuse me through what you say
You say you love me
But don't seem to care

Why don't we just be friends?
Nothing more
Nothing less

Perhaps you still have feelings for me
But why don't you show them?
Why must you hurt me this way?

I still love you
But I just want to know
Do you feel the same?

2006-08-13T21:12:00.000+08:00

Time After Time

Lying in my bed I hear the clock tick
And think of you
Turning in circles confusion–
Is nothing new
Flashback to warm nights–
Almost left behind
A suitcase of memories
Time after–

Sometimes you picture me–
I'm walking too far ahead
You're calling to me I can't hear
What you have said–
And you say–go slow–
I’ve fallen behind–
The second hand unwinds

If you're lost you can look–and you will find me
Time after time
If you fall I will catch you–I'll be waiting
Time after time

If you fall I will catch you–I will be waiting
Time after time
Time after time

After your picture fades and darkness has
Turned to gray
Watching through windows–I'm wondering
If you're okay
And you say–go slow–
I’ve fallen behind
The drum beats out of time–

If you're lost you can look–and you will find me
Time after time
If you fall I will catch you–I'll be waiting
Time after time

If you fall I will catch you–I will be waiting
Time after time
Time after time

2006-08-11T23:19:00.000+08:00

look at this interesting conversation. these bunch of retainees...

A says:
i'm waiting for that fucker linus' blog to load.

B says:
rflol

C says:
CB

C says:
he is a F head

B says:
gime url plx

C says:
i scared i crash nj

B says:
i blog surfd like shit

C says:
not that i scared ena caught

C says:
scared i whac linus up

A says:
hahahaha.

2006-08-07T21:26:00.000+08:00

i'm playing along with my own joke if that facade continues.
i'm tired of wearing a mask.

2006-08-07T21:20:00.000+08:00

A world has opened for us

A world that's bright and gay
A world that's full of interest
Since to school we found our way
It's a world that's full of gladness
And we're happy all the day
And we learn that only busy folks
Can be bright and true and gay
It's at Fairfield, at Fairfield
Where all the world is bright
Where love is in the sunshine
And our hearts are gay and light
Oh! It's Fairfield, at Fairfield
Where all the world is bright
Where love is in the sunshine
And our hearts are gay and light

There we live and work and study
There we walk in wisdom's ways
Gaining strength for all the future
Far and near we'll sing thy praise
May blessings be upon thee
May many find thy halls
May the leaders of the future
Be found within thy walls
Here's to Fairfield, to Fairfield
To every student here
To every happy fairsian
And to every teacher dear
Oh! It's Fairfield, at Fairfield
Where all the world is bright
Where love is in the sunshine
And all the world is bright.

2006-07-24T22:56:00.001+08:00

choir farewell on friday was great! the buffet was yummy and the concert we put up was fabulous! 3 cheers to the 06=07 choir members! but the stupid hg had to leave before the ending. so spoiler.. anyway, to the j2 bass seniors: thanks for the mini shirt and A4 card!!! (: to royston: thanks for the book! (: all in all, it was good time spent. i missed the fairsians! hahaha.

saturday's junior-senior com bbq at cheryl's house was filing and a great time of bonding! first and foremost, kudos to cheryl for hosting this event! and her parents for the delicious food! (: its a pity i didn't take any photos of the food cause you might just drool in front of your desktop. haha.

i haven't uploaded the pics onto the com yet cause i'm lazy! haha. oops. the swimming pics i promised are not up yet. another day, another day. hahaha. procrastinator me. that's why i'm in deep crap now. my EoM was due last friday and i'm rushing it now!

tata.

tag replies;
roman; your results didn't reflect what i said because you didn't give your best for this ct! thanks once again! (:
nat; haha. i never meh? anyway, i wanna see your new house!
tiffany; hey! so how was the farewell? see me embarrass myself very funny right?hahahaha. yeah. its better! (:
xiaohui; hello! hahah. you're welcome! glad to know that it was wonderful! (:
yuehhsin; hahahahahah. yo yo yo... LOL.
stella; hey, haha. okay thanks! (:
luan; eh, sunil is an indian name la! haha. found out on friendster lol. thanks! you lot always make me laugh! hahahaha.
xian; yeap i linked you already! (:

2006-07-19T21:14:00.000+08:00

gp va.
EoM.
choir farewell.

these things are well enough for the week.

2006-07-17T00:22:00.001+08:00

i've got nothing more to say, nothing more to ask, nothing more to know.

i'm at a loss.

but i still have faith in you. don't let me down.

2006-07-16T21:48:00.000+08:00

i'm tired of lying.
i'm tired of caring.
i'm tired of trying.
i'm tired of crying.
i'm tired of talking.
i'm tired of reacting.
i'm tired of listening.
i'm tired of worrying.
i'm tired of explaining.
i'm tired of understanding.
i'm tired of feelings.
i'm tired of being jealous.
i'm tired of being concerned.
i'm tired of being angry.
i'm tired of being upset.
i'm tired of false hope.
i'm tired of having sleepless nights.
i'm tired of having to find out things myself.
im tired of lies and deceit.
i'm tired of "going nowhere".
i'm tird of all the problems.
i'm tired of being like that.
change? or just give up.
maybe i'm tired of that too.

oh God, please help me.

Enter his gates with thanksgiving
and His courts with praise;
give thanks to Him and praise His name.
For the LORD is good and His love endures forever;
His faithfulness continues through all generations."
Psalm 100: 4-5

why has life become so much more complicated? its all my fault that i'm tangled up in this mess. i created it myself. i can't let anybody, even God, to pick up all of the garbage that i left behind.

all your promises will come to past.

anyway, thank God that i passed biology with a C. even though i expected a higher grade, nevertheless i'm grateful! (:

tag replies;
luan; haha. thanks alot! i don't mind lehh...
roy; hey! thank you! (: i can't wait for the senior junior com outing!
mavis; yeah! i'm sure you've have a great time! (: i wanna go back to italy again.. haha. thanks!

it's hard as it is without us being left behind.

2006-07-13T22:37:00.001+08:00

ok. its time for a 'normal' post. haha. the swimming nationals officially ended yesterday. haha. thanks for those on my tagboard who gave me encouragements. i really appreciate it! (: haha. i got last in my heat (out of 8) but 2 people pulled out. so according to zee, technically i wasn't the last. haha. the girls got 4th overall. well done! (: good exprience overall. saw the ac and rafflesian spirit. not bad at all! am i still clinging on to the 'darn dsa' thought? sigh. thanks hg for coming to watch yesterday! (: anyway its so near your place. haha. took pics, threw people into the pool, then there was team dinner. some photos here:(its taking forever to load. shall put it up tml)

and praise be to God for my ct results! its by God's grace that i could get those marks. it was really tough to handle the shitty first 2 weeks of the holidays, compounded by choir and swimming, and going out of course! haha. thank You Lord! once again You have blessed me with results that i would have not expected to get. thank You for always being there for me to entrust all my troubles and anxieties. thank You for giving me seniors and friends who are there for me and whom i can ask questions! all in all Lord, please be there for those whom i know who are disappointed with their results. make it be known to them that You are there for them and whatever the case, just give thanks to You. for the rest of the results Lord, i just leave it in your hands.

maths: 52/100 D
chemistry: 46.3/100 E
economics 61/100 B

special mention:
sophie! thanks for lending me all your precious econs notes! thanks for being proud of me and being there to spur me on! (:
roman! you science and maths expert. walking encyclopedia! thanks for answering me wherever and whenever! (:
hg! gp 100% fellow. thanks for giving me the confidence for my gp paper! (:

all the best for your prelims and the upcoming As!

ok. school life's going to be back to normal for me now that lectures are starting and swimming's over. but will it go back totally to before?

little by little,
i think we'll understand this.
little by little,
i think we'll comprehend it.
little by little,
you'll take me as i am.

ciao!

2006-07-11T16:23:00.000+08:00

its all about take
you took too much.
there's nothing left inside.
i'm all used up.

2006-07-09T22:02:00.000+08:00

satan gave me all i wanted,
but God took all of them away.

my voice is gone - withered away like a rose. i couldn't sing for worship today ):

mum and sis came back today. got new shoes and a bag! (:

band concert yesterday was funny. especially when julian did those moves! woohoo!!!! hahahaha.

life sucks. it is unfair.

2006-07-08T16:13:00.000+08:00

two are better than one...
if one falls down,
his friend can help him up.

ecclesiastes 4:9-10

tthank you.

2006-07-06T21:54:00.000+08:00

argh!!! my nerves are getting to me.

today's chinese oral was a piece of cake (like real) but i was comfortable, not very nervous. thank you Lord! please let it be the same as tomorrow! my competition is in 12 hours time! argh!!! my plunging is doomed la. just hope that my goggles don't fall off. i don't want to embarrass myself. haha.

to the choir com:
i'm utterly sorry that at this time of rushing for the seniors farewell, i'm always not around due to my competition. as it is, i don't think i've assumed my duty as a section leader yet. thanks xingqun, for helping me to lead sectionals these few days! (: i'll fufil my duty once my competition is over!

tag replies;
luan; i couldn't finish the part b of the essay. sickening, but anyway we're getting it back next week, enjoy our weekend! hahaha.
rachel; hahaha. its so fun! LOL.
yuehhsin; chinese was okay. thanks alot! (:
soe; heyo! gogogo!
joan; hey! saw you swim that day. you did well! omg. 3rd in heats la!
char; yeap yeap! sorry i didn't go!
hg; you help me la! i dunno how to. hahaha.
rachel; hey! thanks rachel! (:

2006-07-05T21:57:00.000+08:00

heard this at your house that day. all the best girl!

Break You
Marion Raven

I was your girl
Gave you my world
My everything
But you wouldn´t see

I had your back
I backed you up
Whatever I did
Was never enough

Just you
You
That's all you ever thought about
You
You
No one matters like you do
What goes around comes around
You should know by now

Bet you never thought that I could break you
Did you think that I would look the other way
Yeah you had it all figured out
But tell me who's the one who's crying now

The palm of your hand
That was your plan
Gave me no time
But now you want mine

It's all about take
You took too much
Nothing inside
I'm all used up

Come on
You
You
Nothing else matters like you do
You know what I'm talkin' ‘bout don't you
What goes around comes around
You should know by now

Bet you never thought that I could break you
Did you think that I would look the other way
Yeah you had it all figured out
But tell me who's the one who's crying now

On your one night stands
(should've thought about that)
Says she's just a friend
(should've thought about that)
Are you satisfied now?
(should've thought about that)
Cause you can't hold me down
Not now
I wanna thank you ‘cause now I'm free
I can breathe again and I'm never going back to you

Bet you never thought that I could break you
Did you think that I would look the other way?
Yeah you had it all figured out
But tell me who's the one who's crying now
Yeah yeah

Bet you never thought that I could break you
(Bet you never thought that I could break you)
Did you think that I would look the other way
Yeah you had it all figured out
but tell me who's the one who's crying now

okay. after posting the previous post, i left for my chinese oral. i was too comfortable. hahaha. hope it'll be like that tomorrow! after oral (got 10/15), then i went with ben to acsi to collect his o level cert and try his delicious canteen food. popped over to fairfield too to collect my cert, then i met fiona! haven't seen her in ages! caught up with stuff. then went to btp to play pool. haven't played in a while. the funny thing was that i bought a 3 dollar shirt to change cause i was wearing school uniform. then i had to change in the walkway cause the toilets were under renovation.

thoughts kept on coming back then.

today, i went to tp swimming complex straight. met joan, janelle and sijay. haha. went to try plunging after the first half of the competition was over. i still suck at it. oh well... had loads of fun after that...... that's another story.

anyway, i'm going back to school tomorrow for some choir practice in the morning. that's how packed i am. omg. all these, please end for me.

ciao!

2006-07-04T10:47:00.000+08:00

haha. i'm only left with chinese oral now, which is what i'm currently waiting for to start.i'm using the school's laptop which needs to be returned by 11. sucky. gah, now what i'm scared of is the actual a level oral.

the sunday last week was youth and missions sunday. so there was a party for the youths. had mouth-watering pizza and sinful fudge cake. mmmm, delicious! also, yinling came back for holiday! she was going back that night so my ykg wanted to go out with her. in the end, we rented spongebob squarepants the movie, and big momma's house 1 and 2, and headed to malvin's house to watch. stella's mum baked chewy sweet chocolate chip cookies. it tasted heavenly! i feel so guilty eating all these cause my nationals are coming. we only had time to watch spongebob and big momma's house 1, but nevertherless, it was good time spent. hey, cts are over anyway! all the best yinling, we'll miss you! she's only coming back during christmas.

yesterday was a hectic day for me. headed to kap for choir com meeting. then went for my piano lesson, after that, headed to soe's house for maths va. running here and there. was bushed by the time i came back.

just heard from hg that my ipod has virus. nooooooooooooo!!!!!! but my com at home is full of it, so it shouldn't be surprising. that means my camera and thumbdrive all have viruses. sickening.

ok. need to return the lappy now. ciao!

2006-07-01T00:52:00.000+08:00

FINALLY.

~~CHINESE~~

well, actually there's still listening compre and oral.

and guess what? my a level chinese oral is next thursday which clashes with my competition heats.

oh, speaking about the swimming nationals, i get to skip school for 1 WEEK.

i don't wanna get back my common test results anyway.

i'm so happy now! lalalalala.

swing sling! (:

2006-06-29T15:43:00.000+08:00

well, i don't think i need that now!

~~BIOLOGY~~

i'm quite pleased with myself actually. i completed all the questions! (:

i got my arena trunks and shorts today for the team. oh man, it looks damn cool! the shirt is going to be sent for printing. hahaha.

tag replies;
yuanhao; haha. its not alot! i'm sure you get the same amount on your blog too!
rachel; hahaha. oh man. was it at the concert? hahahahaha. its okay already! thanks. nah. pimples don't make one look ugly. ask somebody lor. haha.
zee; hey, at least i recognised you lor. if not i'll just put it as mine. haha. i felt that way, and i was lazy to write it out. thanks!!
nat; haha. your ikea bed nice? must send me pics k!

before the times spent with you,
there were things i never knew.

during the times spent with you,
there is something that i'd feel.

in your eyes i see a light,
that would pull me out of blight.

here i am in love with you,
there you are,
i never knew.
-edited-